Category: success

Sharpen Your Ax to Develop the Best in You

Ecclesiastes 10:10 says, “If the ax is dull and its edges unsharpened, more strength is needed, but skill will bring success.”

Setting out to accomplish any goal without the necessary skills or tools is like trying to chop wood with a dull ax. You must overcompensate your efforts by applying more strength and muscle to accomplish the task, requiring additional time and energy. The duller the ax, the stronger the effort and the less efficiency involved.

Developing your leadership skills is critical at every level within any workplace or organization. Why? Because these aptitudes contribute to a healthy and effective workplace culture. In fact, 83% of organizations state the importance of cultivating leadership at all levels within the workplace hierarchy.

Yet, many also express their leaders are simply not ready to helm the organization. Despite the widespread availability of comprehensive leadership books and programs, people often lack the skills needed to lead an organization at any level.

These considerations bring me back to my military days. I initially did so well when tasked with an assignment to turn around inadequate conditions and boost morale amongst soldiers by helping them acquire new skills and abilities. Eventually accomplishing this goal, I was overjoyed to see the soldiers so proud of themselves. I went on to believe my next assignment would offer a chance to relax and relieve the pressures of my last one: only to find that I was embarking on a new challenge even more demanding than the last. With each new rank and level of responsibility came an even greater test. It was during these times that I realized the Army wanted me to excel and develop my skills at a higher echelon: with my superiors not only expecting elevated levels of proficiency and competency but also encouraging continuous learning and the application of related skills to accomplish any given mission. Hence, the Army was seemingly more interested in my leadership development than my ability to learn new tasks I’d only go on to forget months later.

There’s a difference between learning new skills and developing them as a leader within an organization—as new learning adds new skills to the toolbox that are further honed and utilized for their intended purpose. In essence, this helps leaders solve diverse problems facing any organization. Development inspires leaders to take on all challenges presented with the right mindset and a passion to train others to resolve problems, as well. This is even more true in the diverse and fast-paced world we live in today.

As leaders in the workplace (or even as parents in our homes), we need to sharpen our tools so they are ready to tackle any given challenge and ultimately summon the best return and reward for our efforts. With respect to leadership, this means developing related skills to influence those around you. As a parent, improving leadership aptitudes can bring everyone closer as a family and result in more congenial conditions at home.

To quote John Maxwell, “You can’t give what you don’t have.” As a leader, if you lack the skills needed to successfully execute this role, sharpen your ax through education, training, and professional development. Likewise, as a parent, sharpen your ax by developing effective communication strategies with your family members, improving your listening skills, and serving as a role model for those you love.

Dr. D

The Carolyle Destiny Group
https://linktr.ee/TheCarolyleDestinyGroup
(Tomorrow’s Destiny becomes Today Direction)

Growth thrives in conducive surroundings

At some point, a person feels the need to evolve, to enter a new dimension of life.  Perhaps, to advance a skill, a new career, or develop their relationships with others. This requires growth to happen.  But for growth to happen, the person’s environment must change.

We all know how growth happens in plants. It starts with a seed that must be implanted into fertile soil full of nutrients to form roots. It also needs sunlight, air, and water, which, through the process of photosynthesis, helps the growing seed produce its own food source. In the right conditions, the seed begins to grow into a plant, and that plant grows to its full potential. If one of these elements are absent, the seed may never take root or achieve full growth. If you plant a seed in an environment where one of these elements is absent, growth is inhibited, and the seed’s full potential is never realized. The seed remains dormant.

That principle works the same in your life and mine. For growth to happen, your environment must be conducive to growth. It must have the right nutrients to stimulate growth. If you want to change your current situation or circumstances, you must change your present environment. To quote, John Maxwell, “Growth is the only guarantee that tomorrow is going to get better.”

In my two decades in the military. The stage was already set for growth opportunities, even though, I did not know at the time.  Every new assignment I went to, something was always wrong. Logistical processes were not in place, customers were unhappy for not getting their supplies on time. And the morale of the troops was down which, compounded the unhappy-customers problem. Sometimes I complained to my peers that I always got the most challenging assignments.  It was then that I recognized another of John’s principles: you must get out of your comfort zone to grow. When I finished the assignment, the logistical processes were far better than the previous ones, the morale within my area of responsibility was extremely high, and my customers were giving my operation rave reviews.

At first, I didn’t understand why I got the hard and challenging jobs. Later, I realized that the military, gave me the growth environment needed to recognize and grow to my potential.  As the saying goes, with each promotion comes more responsibility. I must have impressed my senior officers because they expected my performance to be top level. My performance in my military career led me to exponential growth, higher compensation, and bonuses. 

What does a growth environment look like for you?   

Remember, in order for a seed to grow, it needs the right soil, sunlight, air and water.   

Is your present environment helping you, and not holding you back?  Assess where you are right now!

  1. Are you in a place where others are ahead of you, or are you the go-to person? Are you the smartest one in the room? Then what and who is pouring into you? You are not getting the necessary nutrients for growth. If you are pouring everything you have into others, who is pouring into you?
  2. Are you challenged on a constant basis, if not find the right environment to grow in.

Lastly, leaders must create a growth environment within their organization or areas of influence.  Used these tips to build an organization with growth potential. 

  1. Set the bar high on proficiency, efficiency, and innovation.
  2. Give employees challenging work, nothing beneath them. And if they do not know how to do it, train them the right way first, then expect them to maintain the standard.
  3. Cultivate an affirming atmosphere. Nurture and nourish your people for growth.
  4. Model growth in front of them. Lead from the front, not the rear. I always say: “The most valuable gift I can give to others is a good example.” There is nothing more confusing than a person who gives good advice but sets a bad example. To quote (again) John Maxwell: “A pint of example is worth a gallon of advice.”

Remember, growth is the only guarantee that tomorrow will get better. If you don’t know whether your present environment is a growth environment, do an assessment and make changes.

The bottom line is that a growth environment aids in growth. It doesn’t hold you back.

Lastly, if you are a leader, you are responsible for helping others grow and creating an atmosphere of growth. Grow leaders, don’t just tell them what to do.

What are your comments?

See you at the top!

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Goal mindset versus growth mindset

I set a lot of goals for my life. Many of them I have hit the bull’s eye. Others I have fell short of the objective, and we have certain milestones or targets that we need to hit along the way in order to realize the goal. When you hit the target or goal, you feel good or ecstatic.

Earl Nightingale said it the best—that success is the realization of a worthy ideal.

But the problem with goal setting is our tendency not to see what’s next on our journey. Some would say, “Derrick, I have reached the peak of this mountain that I set for myself.” Sadly, many lose the drive, no stamina or no desire, and they stop at that point. It’s like you accomplished a small success, and then you  rest on that small success. You never move forward or beyond.

When you think about a growth conscious person, they continue beyond that goal and take on a different mindset. In fact, they want growth. You will continue growth, and you will hit all your goals when you look back on your journey five or ten years later. 

Man, that is a great feeling to move on to greater heights. You keep climbing the ladder until you reach heaven, and then you can stop. This reminds me of the song from the TV show, The Jeffersons, which is a part of my story, “We’re moving on up to the east side.” I remember in the early days when I was in my 20s. I had just started a family and had a new job, which was 20 miles away from home. I needed transportation, and I didn’t have a lot of money. Neither my mother nor my siblings had the money to lend me to buy a decent vehicle. I saw an ad in the local newspaper that a private owner had a 1970 Plymouth that was once a taxicab for sale. The private owner removed the decals and the taxi cab signs. But it still had the painted colors of the local taxicab company.

 On occasion I would get flagged down on the street by people wanting cab service. Many times I would stop to the anticipating customer and explain that my vehicle was privately owned, and they would have to call the local taxi cab company. Some would get really upset at me. This vehicle was always in the repair shop. Finally, I got tired of folks flagging me down and shoveling out wasted money for a beat-up vehicle, so I brought another used car, a Chevrolet Vega, which had an aluminum engine block. That car lasted a few months. The engine block cracked, and blue smoke traced my path down the local streets. I kept working through my trouble vehicles for three years when I bought a new Caravan off the showroom floor. That was a good feeling. However, I was in the military and serving my country and paying big monthly payments. Suze Orman taught me the lesson to stop using finance companies. But that took growth and hitting goal after goal after goal. During this time, I developed a growth plan for my life and started getting mentors in my life. Each mentor taught me growth principles that helped facilitate growth and maturity in my life. Looking back over my present journey, I see the growth, and the pain of growth. You may say that was great and proud of you. But I just don’t have the energy, knowledge, money, or time to plan for other growth challenges. 

John Maxwell said, “now is the best time to start anything.” Ask yourself, if not now WHEN? Growth is intentional, not accidental.

The real process of growth begins with your thoughts. Those thoughts become words, and the words become actions! James Allen, author of As a Man Thinketh, says, “You cannot travel within and stand still without.” Think about it. All life, except mankind, grows to its full potential. It’s only mankind that circumvents the process. For example, how tall will a tree grow? A tree doesn’t decide to stop growing. It continues growing all its life. 

So, I challenge you not to stop or do away with goal setting but go above and beyond goal setting and latch on to the growth mindset.

I love personal growth and development. And I think you will, too, once you start seeing a difference by applying what I have shared with you in this blog.

Derrick Darden, PhD

How to handle conflict and commit to the customer

Derrick C Darden, PhD

There’s an old saying by Sam Walton: “There is only one boss, the customer. Serving the customer is the reason your business exists. In the professional world, your job, whether it’s in sales, services or manufacturing, revolves around the customer.”

However, what happens when there is a conflict between a customer and an employee?

In this short blog, we will talk about how to handle those situations. Unfortunately, they are inevitable, but we have some tips and tricks on how to resolve them.

But before we get to them, I want to tell you a story.

I once heard about a customer who was waiting patiently to be seen by the optometrist to be fitted with new glasses. Her number was finally called, but instead of the optometrist technician waiting directly on her, he decided to answer a question from a customer who hadn’t taken a number at all. “Ironically, this same technician was rude to my husband only a month ago,” the customer remembered.

Now, this customer became infuriated and very loud. Of course, this got the attention of everyone in the store.  In the meantime, the manager was watching this take place in the background and quickly came to the aid of the furious customer. The quickly extinguished the situation. He took care of the customer, and the customer left happy.

As this story illustrates, one way to resolve a conflict to get straight to the source. What is the source? It is the foundation of how this conflict occurred. There’s always a second perception behind the truth. Maybe the customer was irritated by another, unrelated situation. But you assume that all this anger and resentment is geared towards you. Most of the time, the customer doesn’t have a personal problem, but a consumer problem. And, as a consumer, they must get quality and satisfaction.

So avoid complaining to others and whimpering. Avoid negative name-calling and further eroding your relationship with that customer.

Second, dissect the problem, not each other. Attack the problem by looking at it from different angles, then ask the customer to help buy into the solution.

Third, avoid the “blame game.” Instead of wasting your energy in finger-pointing and trying to prove your point (if there is a point to be made), direct your energy to resolving the issue at hand.

Here are some other tips on how to resolve a conflict with a customer:

1.      Listen to your customer’s concerns, get an understanding of what is being said, take off the filters. Listen with both ears, and speak once.

2.      Remember the golden rule: Do onto others as you want them to do unto you. You cannot judge someone. Put yourself in that customer’s shoes. As the saying goes, you can’t judge a person until you walk a mile in their shoes.

3.      Understanding is key. Understand why the conflict happened. What are some of the causes? Never assume that these things always happen.

4.      Lastly, to fix the conflict, go to the customer and make things right between you two. Re-establish your relationship and earn back their trust.

I hope this article will help you with your decision making. And remember – without conflict, life would be boring!

Different Working Cultures in the USA, United Kingdom, and Australia

 

Starting a new job is always daunting, so it helps to have some idea what to expect—especially if you’re working abroad. You may be confident in your ability to do the work, but what about fitting into a foreign workplace? Learning the language is crucial, of course, but it’s only part of the picture. Countries such as the UK, the USA, and Australia all speak English . . . but they’re so different in other ways that they frequently baffle each other. Obviously, no two workplaces—let alone two individual human beings—are the same. Not all Americans are workaholics and not all Brits are shy about telling you what they think. That said, if you’re thinking of working in one of those three countries, here are some cultural differences to keep in mind . . .

If your British boss says “By the way, perhaps you could make these changes?” then you’d better make them. If they call something “a bit disappointing,” you should be very concerned. Understatement can be confusing and frustrating to people from cultures that prefer to communicate more directly. But from the British perspective, telling someone bluntly what you want them to do feels arrogant and aggressive—they’d rather leave room for you to pretend it was your idea all along.

In an Australian workplace, you probably won’t have much trouble figuring out what your colleagues actually mean. Communication is usually direct, even blunt . . . once you get to the point. Australians are often uncomfortable with overt displays of authority, and have their own ways of avoiding the possibility of being seen as too pushy. It’s common to spend a good fifteen minutes at the start of a meeting talking about anything other than work. You’ll also encounter a lot of slang and plenty of swearing.

You don’t have to do much reading between the lines in a USA setting either—direct questions and literal statements are the norm, and there’s no lingering on other topics before getting down to business. But if something goes wrong, Americans are less likely to be blunt about it—they’ll explain the problem, but they’ll try to “wrap” it in positives too. The focus on optimistic, upbeat communication is also key to how Americans expect you to talk about yourself.

Despite their other differences, both Britons and Australians are uneasy about self-promotion. Not so in the USA, where making sure your accomplishments are recognized is a necessary skill.

Office Romances

Each country’s attitude towards love in the workplace varies, with the USA the most strait-laced, Australia the most easygoing, and the UK somewhere in between. One-third of American businesses have policies prohibiting romances between team members, and one in ten won’t even tolerate relationships between workers from different departments. Such rules are rare (even, arguably, illegal) in the UK and Australia, though some UK workplaces will expect you to disclose relationships to a manager. In Australia, so long as it doesn’t interfere with your work, you should be fine.

Dress Codes

Norms in the UK and USA are fairly similar, at least as far as differences in climate allow. Some industries, such as law and banking, are more formal, with suits, tailored garments, and somber colors still the norm. In more creative industries there’s an increasing trend towards more casual wear. You should still probably dress conservatively at your interview and on your first day to be on the safe side, but don’t be surprised to see t-shirts, jeans, and sneakers when you get there.

You should err on the side of caution to begin with in Australia too—but you’ll rarely be expected to wear a tie or a suit jacket. And when small, creative workplaces get casual, they sometimes get very casual—you may even see bare feet!

Work/Life Balance

Given their reputation for being tightly wound, it may be surprising that it’s the British who are most likely to go home on time and least likely to complain if you’re late. They also have the longest holidays and the most paid sick leave (although less of both than many neighboring European countries.) But perhaps it’s partly down to their long commutes: the average Briton spends 54 minutes getting to work each morning—it’s just 29 minutes for Australians and 23 for Americans. Meanwhile, Australia may be famous for being “laid-back,” but lateness is frowned upon, as is rushing out the door as soon as your shift is technically over.

Of the three, the USA expects the longest working hours, and there’s no legal requirement for employers to provide any paid time off or sick leave, although private sector workers do receive an average of 15 days off.

Whether you consider America’s “very hardworking” self-image accurate will depend on where you come from—plenty of nations work longer hours, including South Korea, Greece, and Russia! The payoff is the potential for higher earnings—an American senior manager can earn almost twice what an equivalent worker in the UK can expect.

Kaplan International

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